~Making effort~

Am I really making effort to back to your side?

I don't think so. 

There is some time I wanna call you badly and I pray everyday things will get back like last time.

But things already happened. 

Not to say who is the victim for this tragedy, but why I am the only one making effort to get repair our friendship? Maybe we should do it together? 

So please don't tell me I am not making effort towards our friendship.

I am waiting for you with an open heart but I'm not clear about you. How about you PM me and tell me what are you thinking?

I'm tired of guessing what should I do next and what is the next reaction I should give when things happen.

My birthday is coming soon but for the first time in my life planning for my birthday celebration is never been this sad. 

Is it the end of our story?

I thought we can share every moment till the day we get old. :(

~Missing you~

It's been a while I didn't update my not so happening blog.

Tonnes of shit happened in my life but I didn't spill a word in here probably because of I'm such an attention whore? so I posted all my grieve and anger in Twitter and Facebook.
I should write more starting from now onwards.

Alright, I should be start updating about myself. * I know you care about me! *
Where should I start? 

How about something really changed my life dramatically?

I've been accused as an Ipod thief. Life can never be this sucks. All my dignity as a bestie to her is gone and I guess maybe FOREVER? I'm not going to tell the whole story here. If you are my friend then probably you don't even need a note I guess you can remember and even memorize it well.
Either she want to believe it or not, I don't even care about that anymore. I'm trying my best to clarified I'm not the one and yet things ended up pretty badly. You want me to stand in your shoe?

I'm sorry but I can't. 

A good reason why I won't steal your Ipod is neither I own an Iphone 4 nor Sony mp4, but you one of my closest friend. After sharing almost every moments in my life, I can't even imagine until the day I die this kind of thing will happen between us.

I'm not trying to fight with you or being sarcastically telling you this.

Because I thought you trust me. HARD

When I look at the stuff around me, most of them makes me think of you.
When people ask me who is my bestie and I can't answer straight away anymore.

There is a hole in my heart where is only for you. 

Only you.

I don't know what will happen between you and me but I hope you come back to fill in the hole in my heart soon. I mean real soon.
I'm not going to ask you come back to me until the day you trust me just like us before April.
Hope you live your life happily.

I will miss you from here. I really miss you so bad. :(